Forgetting is no excuse.
This morning I woke up and went to horses to give Titan his Lucerne and then what I usually do is I go to the shed and get bird seed and feed the birds, this requires me and Leila each to have 8Kg of bird seed which is 4Kg per bird feeder and this is enough for them for the day.
Now as I got to the shed I saw that we only had 12Kg of seed left and this is a problem because now we are kind of out of seed, and for a point as such to manifest it had to be created through space and time within a couple of days of time and then accumulated to the ultimate consequences, all because I did not consider the physical and space time and that if I do not let someone know beforehand that we need seed we will run out and then we will have a problem.
Because all the birds on the farm has become dependent on us and giving them seed, plus the birds were never there so us giving them food allowed them to stay here, so now that I did not consider them and their reality in time and did not make preparations for the future of them and their lives which depends on me giving them seeds, I have placed them as great risk and this is un-acceptable.
So now someone has to get seed today, not tomorrow or the day after but today, and this creates a point of stress for me because I did not handle this properly and this is the second time this is happening.
Forgetting is simply not an excuse at all, I mean if someone now has to ask me so why did you forget then I will see with in myself that I cannot use any of the excuses I have created in my head and or validate any one of them because it is simply judgment or blame or pointing finger, so I saw and see that I had the eyes/ the moments and the physical here with me every time I went into the shed to get seed to see that the bird seed was getting less and there will be no magic that will bring seed into the shed and that i have to arrange before hand to get more before it runs out.
So No excuses and I see I am fully responsible for it all and that I have to fix is today and learn from my mistake, because if this was a day later and there were no food then birds would have died, because birds have a very fast metabolism and they fly they burn energy very fast and thus they require food daily nonstop till they go to sleep, thus if I forget seed I become a mass murderer.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to take simple physical considerations for granted.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not consider space time with in and as the physical and how the outcome of things can be to create preventions.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not be here with in and as breathe when I do and apply myself with in activities to be fully aware of the moment in consideration of all things here in the physical and to practically apply myself accordingly to be effective and self responsible for myself and my environment and my world
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear the consequences and the shame and regret of forgetting and place other beings at risk that trusted me.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to regret
I allow myself to instead learn and understand and to through that change to what is best for all in and as the physical.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself o give attention to the shame and regret instead of the lesson that must be learned, because that is best for all.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear taking full responsibility for my actions and admitting them because I fear that I will be revealed as inconsiderate and abusive in nature.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear facing who i have accepted and allowed myself to become as a living robot that only moves and acts in its programmed way and not within each breath here one and equal.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to want to hide from myself instead of facing the point in the physical and correcting it.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear facing the physical with in correction,
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to anticipate that the physical correction might be unpleasant.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear unpleasantness.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to give into the mind instead of what is best for all.
I allow myself to correct myself.
I allow myself to take action.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to create situations of unpleasantness for myself through in considerations and ignorance of each moment here.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to make me as who i am as a un pleasant experience for myself.
Breathe
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